I Have to Leave Here Again

I’m so upset that it’s come to this

Kendra Sparkles
3 min readAug 12, 2024
Photo by Tolu Akinyemi 🇳🇬 on Unsplash

Last fall, I sat on my kitchen floor crying, unable to get up. Through fat, ugly tears I told my husband that I couldn’t cope with things anymore. My one and two-year-old daughters were fighting constantly and keeping me up all night. We were living in my father-in-law’s house and our house-hunting seemed to be getting us nowhere.

I had no time or space to breathe and was suffocating slowly.

What got me through that tumultuous time was working on my novel. Progress was painfully slow. Often, only a couple hundred words or a fragmented thought a day was all I could manage on only a few hours of sleep, but each word saved me from spiraling further.

My novel writing course with it’s endless support and invaluable coaching sessions was my lifeline. At the time, I was focusing my few precious moments a day on my book and had been neglecting blogging. Free time and mental energy were in very, very short supply.

Things started to improve once we found our house and I got my own space back. My daughters are a year older, still a handful but sleeping more, so I celebrate the small victories. Nervously, I started back on the platform with the intention of both finishing my novel and publishing one story a week on here.

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